How to deal with Unexpected stresses

svetoslav80 said:
I can't even deal with expected stress, like I need to go now and translate real time for my mother and her tenants. Which is very stressful, because I'm brain fogged, in pain, and not had enough sleep. Good to know though, I'm not the only one to avoid conversations, I was starting to feel guilty.
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Its horrible. Making conversation is torture. Its the one thing that people really struggle to understand that we have a problem with.

Like the taxi situation, when i’m struggling, people say ‘oh just get a taxi’ as if thats an answer to my problem of going somewhere.

Sometimes talking to a taxi driver for 15 minutes is more damaging than if i tried to travel somewhere on foot; both causing different types of harm.

I can usually chat for around 20 minutes max before i start to malfunction before people’s eyes and my words become scrambled and i can’t complete a sentence.

Once i scramble the first sentence, it goes quickly downhill from there and i have to get away, partly from humiliation :oops:

So if i chat to a taxi driver, that has used up the chat time that i needed for whichever person i was travelling to see :banghead: by the time i arrive, my brain is almost ready to go back home :ill:

I used to try to explain to people that i’m too ill to talk, but it always seems to require an extraordinary amount of sentences to make them understand, and to shut the hell up. By the time they understand, i’ve still wasted 5-10 minutes of talking, just to explain i can’t talk lol :banghead:

Or! They translate this to mean, that i can’t talk.... BUT i can still listen to them talk incessantly which still requires interaction and is possibly even more draining :banghead: :banghead:
 
hedgehog said:
So sorry you're dealing with something this stressful and that you had to work your body beyond it's comfort level. I hope the doctors have answers for your partner soon and that you and your mom can get some much needed rest :hug:
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Thank you @hedgehog I felt so bad taking mam to hospital with me. I couldn’t have done it without her. I’m hoping she’s at home resting now and taking it easy.
I’m lying here, trying to figure out how and when i can next visit.

My mam visits me once a week and brings food basics with her which i try to make last a week. But because i try to not go over 5-6 food items so she doesn’t have too much to carry, i used my shopping item allowance to buy food and snacks for my partner to take to hospital with us.

So my personal shopping for this week is a small bottle of milk haha.

I felt so bad asking mam to get shopping ‘for me/for someone else’ Urrghhhh :banghead: :bawling:

The feeling of complete inadequacy is overiding the feeling of the truck running over me right now.
 
I completely understand the conversation the thing.

It's so much worse with people I don't know for a start, they will insist of talking quickly, mumbling, talking over radios (especially in taxi). Then if they have a strong or unfamiliar accent ..... I don't mean a foreign accent here - any one will do.

The thoughts of translating from one language to another. Hats off to you @svetoslav80!

Even with IM, and we've known each other for over half my life, sometimes I have to say - can't talk. Mind you, he 's normally picked up on it before then.

Taxis or mini cabs- strange cars - weird air freshener. :ill:

Nothing like a crisis, that most normal folk can deal with, to really, really rub your nose in how little you can do. Just in case it wasn't bad enough.

:hug::hug::hug:
 
Invisible Woman said:
Nothing like a crisis, that most normal folk can deal with, to really, really rub your nose in how little you can do. Just in case it wasn't bad enough.

:hug::hug::hug:
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That is so true. Because we’ve made adaptions to every tiny aspect of our lives in order to survive. Relying on certain ways of doing things out of necessity.

When that rug is pulled from under us without warning, we are reminded and come face to face with the harsh reality of our existence :banghead:
 
Hell..hath..no..fury... said:
So if i chat to a taxi driver, that has used up the chat time that i needed for whichever person i was travelling to see :banghead: by the time i arrive, my brain is almost ready to go back home :ill:
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I do understand this. Conversation is exhausting. You have no obligation to entertain the taxi driver. How about pretending to be deaf? Give them a card with the address you want to go to on it, and saying you can't hear well enough to hold a conversation... You need to protect your precious energy.

Hell..hath..no..fury... said:
I felt so bad asking mam to get shopping ‘for me/for someone else’ Urrghhhh :banghead: :bawling:

The feeling of complete inadequacy is overiding the feeling of the truck running over me right now.
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Please try not to feel bad about needing help from your mam. Speaking as a sick mother caring for a sick daughter, I'd hate to think she felt a burden to me. Looking after her gives me a reason to feel I'm doing something worthwhile - I don't think she's a burden. Obviously I can't speak for your mother, but I suspect being able to help you in a small way helps her feel good about herself and to show she cares about you.
 
Invisible Woman said:
Then if they have a strong or unfamiliar accent ..... I don't mean a foreign accent here - any one will do
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Aye there’s nowt worss when someone tarks in a weird accent n ya cannat folla quick enough nd ya dinnit understand a ward ;)

Followed by; ahh divint kna wot ya talkin aboot pet. Speak proppa like ;) :whistle:


Edit: Apologies to all brains damaged in the making of this post.
 
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:laugh::rofl::rofl:

When still working I used to have to go to various clients sites around the country, sometimes alone and sometimes I'd be with a colleague. at one site a woman with a really broad accent turned to me and announced loudly "You'm in'arv gotta funny accent, you'm 'ave!"

i looked at her in disbelief, trying to suppress the urge to kick my sniggering colleague. " I beg your, pardon?" I replied. Funny thing is it came out in pure Queens English and I'm not even English. More sniggering.
 
Update:

He’s still in, no change. I’m going to try to get in tonight but will play it by ear, been 80% paralysed last couple of days :ill:

Turns out i’ve known what was wrong with him the whole time :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

A couple of years ago, doc put him on statins, within a couple of weeks they’d made him ill. He quickly developed severe muscle pains in his legs so he couldn’t cycle anymore (which is how he ended up with motorbike)

The muscle pains developed and I told him to stop taking them. His muscles have never recovered properly and he still gets pain.

I told him to mention statins being the cause to the doc which he scoffed at and ignored.

Since then he has started having more heart flare ups, blaming it on the wolfe parkinson white syndrome but I always had a niggling feeling that if the muscles have been damaged then why not the heart too but it was ignored.

When he first went into hospital, a doc was doing the rounds when i was there. I mentioned the statins to him, and he did that ‘don’t be so bloody ridiculous’ face at me.

A week later, they still have no idea whats wrong with him but know its definitely not the wolfe parkinson.

Today they did a chest x-ray and a different doctor saw him. The ‘only’ thing this one was interested in was his use of statins and the symptoms that developed from it... :whistle:

I’m now kicking myself for not trying out serrapeptase and co q10 on him back at the start, years ago to see if they would have helped at all. They wouldn’t have hurt.

(I already use serrapeptase in Blockbuster Allclear supplements)

Edit: Their plan of attack is Beta Blockers and a blood thinner for a couple of weeks.

He says he doesn’t want to be on meds long term so they‘re gonna do another ablation, (different to the one before) on him a little later. Hopefully out of hospital tomorrow
 
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He’s coming out today now, getting a taxi over in an hour to pick him up.

I’ve been in two minds whether i could even visit him today at all all day, i feel like death :ill: that indecision has been decided for me now lol :dead: i wonder if i can check myself into his empty bed :laugh:

Thank you so so much for the support everyone. I really appreciate it. You’ve kept me going.
 
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