Marie, 49, fell ill with covid 2021 - still not well
Five years after the first Swedish coronavirus cases, thousands of Swedes are still suffering from an illness that no one understands.
Marie Ewerz has not been well for four years - and the symptoms are getting worse and worse.
- ‘You feel so alone,’ she says.
Her son was just 9 years old when he found his mum passed out on the kitchen floor for the first time.
He has seen her turn blue in the face when her throat closed up and she couldn't breathe.
- He has been terrified and barely dared to leave me. It's still there. As soon as I cough, he calls out as if by reflex: ‘Are you OK mum?’ says Marie Ewerz, 49.
The disease she never imagined she would get has fundamentally changed her life.
But the biggest anxiety comes from how it has affected her family, especially her son, who is now 13.
- ‘We had a lot of trouble getting him to school. In the end, it came out that he was worried about what might happen to me at home while he was away. It's very scary. These years where he was just supposed to be a child, he has in some ways become an adult.
Missing everyday life
Marie Ewerz used to be like most people. A happy girl with a thousand irons in the fire, so she says, who liked to exercise, plant plants on the terrace of the terraced house in Linköping, socialise with friends.
That often grey everyday life that makes so many healthy people sigh and complain during all the dark days of the beginning of the year - that's what she wants back more than anything else.
Marie Ewerz fell ill with COVID-19 on 17 February 2021.
She never recovered.
It's been almost four years since she last worked. Now she can barely walk to the kindergarten where she used to work to say hello.
‘It affects the whole family’
It's a tiredness that won't go away. Recurring fever, when her feet feel like they're going to burn up.
A devilish headache almost every day, when it feels like your skull is going to burst.
Lung pain, difficulty reading, writing or looking at a computer screen. Sensitive to sound and light. Difficulty standing without leaning on something. A pulse that races at the slightest exertion.
Marie's illness affects her whole family - especially her 13-year-old son.
She describes it to her son as the battery in her body's phone never charging above 10 per cent. She runs out quickly.
- I often feel guilty. I compare it to his friends' mums, who can go off and do things. Even to my husband. He has to take a lot of responsibility. It affects the whole family.
Cause still unknown
What Marie Ewerz suffers from is called post-covid.
Judith Bruchfeld, consultant and specialist in infectious diseases at Karolinska University Hospital, doesn't like that word.
‘Long-covid’ better describes what it is, she says:
A course of disease that has not ended.
No one knows how many people are affected or how.
The studies Judith Bruchfeld has seen in countries like ours - the US, Canada, the UK - suggest that 1.5% of the population may have severe post-covid.
- This means that you have such severe long-term effects that you have difficulty working and functioning in your everyday life. Postcovid fulfils the definition of a public health disease,’ she says.
Exactly what causes postcovid is still not clear.
There are several theories.
The symptoms can be alleviated
Perhaps the virus or virus residues are still present in the patients.
Perhaps it is an autoimmune disease, where the body's immune system starts attacking healthy cells and tissues.
Perhaps small clots inhibit blood flow in parts of the post-covid patients' bodies.
- ‘There is a strong assumption that the virus or virus residues remain in the body, which can trigger the immune system and have long-term effects,’ says Judith Bruchfeld.
- ‘The closer we get to the mechanisms, the more likely it is that we could, at best, find a cure. We are not there yet. However, there is a lot we can do before we get there.
Many symptoms can be alleviated with the right treatment, says Judith Bruchfeld. She is therefore critical of the fact that almost all post-covid specialised clinics in Sweden have been closed down, while the knowledge support issued by the National Board of Health and Welfare is too vague to provide good support to doctors at all the country's primary care clinics.
Patients need help from someone who sees the disease as a whole, not just a vague collection of symptoms, she says.
Hopes for research
- ‘It is high time to create resources for this patient group. Many suffer in silence, they are so ill that they do not have the energy to push for adequate care. There is also a lack of resources and a better chain of care between primary care and other healthcare providers at the specialist level. There is a lot that needs to be done. It's been 5 years since the start of the pandemic. This is long overdue,’ says Judith Bruchfeld.
Marie Ewerz went to a post-covid rehab clinic in Linköping - until the region closed it down this spring.
- ‘It's a real shame. That's where all the knowledge was,’ she says.
Now she meets an occupational therapist at a neurological rehabilitation unit instead.
The goals in the rehabilitation plan they have drawn up are very, very small.
For example, she should be able to follow the lines of a text well enough to bake a recipe from a cookbook.
- When I read that plan, I can think: Oh my God, am I this sick? says Marie Ewerz.
She has no hope that the care will make her well.
- ‘Not based on the care I receive today. I hope that research is progressing, I know that they are doing research at full speed. I must try to have that hope. My goal is to get well. And if not fully healthy, then at least better. That's the attitude,’ she says.
‘Not working as a human being’
Often the road to recovery just seems to get longer and longer.
She suffers from exertion-induced deterioration (PEM), the same as ME patients can have.
- ‘If I go for a walk, I get sick for the rest of the afternoon. I get a fever, I feel like I have the flu.
And she doesn't get better.
- Quite the opposite. These pem attacks are getting worse, the brain fatigue is getting worse and worse. I'm not functioning as a human being. At the same time, you always have in your head that you want to be who you were. I want so much, but I can't do it.