Does anyone else not feel like themselves mentally? I know people have brain fog. I do, too. I feel like I have lost myself. I am scared as I feel like I am gone. This is Misfit Toy. Ever since I had my thyroid out, this feeling has come and gone. Also, I am either in menopause or now, after 4 months of nothing, getting my period two times in one month. I am on progesterone and now my breasts are hurting and painful. I was on DHEA and had to stop that. I feel lost. I was put on progesterone because my estrogen is super high and I have endometriosis, but my breasts are tender. I am on 50 mg. Before I was on it...I was not good, hence he put me on it. I have had a sex drive and an appetite (not in a relationship or acting on it) that has been crazed. That was before even the progesterone or prednisone. It just came on suddenly. I cry all of the time. There are times where I feel like myself in some small way, but it's short lived. Because I have so much going on, I have severe adrenal issues which have led me to go on Prednisone at 4 mg per day. I am tired on it. So tired. I was on a higher dose and worse. In the last week, my MCAS has gone nuts. Itching everywhere. I know no one can answer this, but how am I supposed to know that I am here? That somewhere deep down, there is me? I am sad that from the moment I got EBV in 1989, one of the first things that was affected was my brain and my ability to hear sound in stereo, see color in all it's glory, etc. I feel like my brain has been under siege. My mom is gone and I used to be able to talk to her about this a long time ago. There is no one to talk to about it anymore. No one knows what I mean. I miss myself. I feel out of control. Missing. My therapist says to be kind to myself. I wish I felt like myself because I would be kind to that person. This person that I am. I don't know who she is. She is not me. The only link to let me know I am still here is music. I like music. When I hear certain music, it brings me back to a time and place, but again....it's like a mood. It comes and goes. I feel depressed and disconnected.